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hello my not very large group of loyal readerss. =)...waves*

shyt...i just got back from london and i SWEAR it was the greatestt london thuss farr!!..damn i actuallyy feel like i love london now!!.weeeeeeeee =) i did soo much and crampeedd up my holsss with lotss of walking and exploring!!.well got there on friday and met up with gordon and jas and met sum girlss from hongkong and this guy andrew...anywess..we just hadd dinner at the four seasons and went shisha-ingg!!..it was pretty retardedd cus i wass so sleepy.yeah then the next day we went to watch hannibal rising at trocedero which wasnt a great idea cus i hateee twisted movies and it was definitely a twisted oneE!!!..hiyah...well all my bruneian frensss were at brunei hall =)..we actuallyy spent one nite just talking about universties cus my frenss just got back from travelling the UK and said the suburbs was a more more nicer place to stay than in central london..yeah ok before that watched breakfast at tiffany's!!.ehehe..i had a pretty good valentiness day!!..CUZ i spent the whole day with my cusin..she brought me OUT..like we had dimsum in china town then walked down SOHO and then down mayfair then to the science museum!!..ahaha..damn we actually into the simulator ride..which was preTTY VIOLENT of a gamee for 8-10year oldss..ehhahha..we had dinner at this THAi reato oh damn..the foodd was just sooooo goodd!!!!..like u just know everyoness enjoying the foodd cus when the foodd comess evryone just getss dead silent =)..oh yeah then i went back to brunei hall on MY OWN by the TUBEE!!!..clap clap!!..so proud of maself!! =P

to get over the depression of valentiness day..we all decided to get presentss for evryone!!.like there were 10 of us...so each of us had to get 10presntss then exhange them at 12!!..it was soo soo farny..like at 12 we sat in the dining hall in a circle and started exchnaging giFTSS ...hehe..tajus bought kimmie a vibrator..hahahaha..and her boyfren bought her an ipod!!..damn!! we were screaming like hell..then fara bought MJ the elmo doll that keepss laughing when u ticklee it!! and fara bought deena an escada perfume..aaahahaha.a..DAmn!!anywess then i went to bed cus i was dead tireDD!!...we were suppose to watch music and lyrics but evryone was damn broke so we didnt in the end!!..

i visited kings college london and attended the lecture with sam!!..we were like so late for the lecture cus of the stupid tubeee delay and then when we walked in the whole place went silentt and the lecturer was like looking at us..i was like FUCK!!!..then he said..now ive lost my train of thought!!.a.ahahah..but later on he just continuEDd..then we had a lunch break then we just walked around covent garden..as u know!!..ive been lookin for a black coat so i was abt to give up cus all the storess sold it either tooo expensive or big or whaytver...then sam decided to go in FCUK...then i found the coat of my dreamsSS..ahahaha..it was 140 but reduced to 60!!...waaaaaaa..i went mad but then sam pulled out another coat but not the same style but i loveedd it too..and it was 120 cut down to 45...shytt..i was torn anddd was aware we werr gonna be late for the next lecture cus it was 15minutes before 2..SO I GOT BOTH!!.jaaajajajahahahaha///im nutss i tell u@@....so we were running like crazy down covent garden!!!! then reached the hall right at 2!.yepp uyeppp///heheehuhuh...the next day i went out to oxford street just cus muizz wanted to get shoesss...by the end of it..i got shoess tooo..ahaha..thiss stupidd wafi kepttt temptingg mee and asking me to buy itt..ahaha..i bought green chucktaylorSS!!..ahahahaha..

i felt really sad actually yesterday so i went out with zirah and mj and decided to go shopping at zAra;s..hehe..then we walked down little venice..itss soo pretty..we just walked along the river and there were swans and duckss along the way..i didnt know abt that place until that day and it was weird cus it was so quiet and peaceful didnt feel like london anymoree =P..oh yeah gong xi fa cai evryone..i didnt do much fro new yearss cus i didnt seee the point in it cus i missss my family and alll i wanna do is just go back for new years but i cant so why bother..i just ate lunch at china town then walkedd back to paddington!!..didnt feel like wtaching the parade..yepp yeppp....
evrynite at brunei hall was so much fun..like we would just play foottball and the ball would like hit the ceiling and evryone would just bee likeee WOO!!..ahahaha...oh yeah we weent to this malaysian resto to have lunch then kamilin wafi muizz and i ordered cucur pisangg..ok it was like 2.20!!...then when it arrived it was damn small!!!..like it was one banana cut into 3!!..ahahah...we were like WTF..this for 2.20!..and there was 4 of us!!..ahahaha..we made so much fun abt it!!..

so on our last nite..we went aand bouught bananas,flour and eggs andcooked cucur pisangg!!..ahahaha...like the kitchen in brunei hhalll aint exactly bigg so like.there were 10 of us all stuffed in the kitchen yelling at each otherr and goinggg ..AREEE u sureee ur suppose to do that??..eeeh!!!!...likee tajus,wafi and fara were sitting on the floorr and going...SUDAH kah?...andd kamilin was by the stovee getting all hot and w ewould yell at him when the bananas got too black!!..ahahah..and this muizzz sittingg down syaing...whatss taking so long??.bah fastter mana the cucur pisangg!! and we would go like..ur not even doing anything!!!..and then yazid gettig ing alll pissy cus we added tonned of icing sugar on the banana's cus he said it was to swEETT!!..and im likeee going SOO HOTTTTT!!!!!!!!.....ahahha...then half way thru the fire alarm went off!!!..and we were liek what the hell??..then it was atcually cus the next rroomm was playing with candless nutss im telling u!!then we all went upstairss and evryone shot gun to not clean the kitchen cus we couldnt be bothered anymre....yepp yepp..that was pretty much brunei halll...i miss it there alredi...but as well i dun mind being back here...but i miss all of themm...they reallly are quite the interesting batch!!

so yeah...im like deciding whether i will applly for uni in london or sumwhere else..hrmm..evryone seems to be going for sub-urban..so it would suck if i was in london and evryone elsee so far,..no ideaa..

i guess its not the worst thing in the world to have someone love u more than anything else in the whole wide world..the heart wants what it wants and sumtimes that can be a flaw..our own human weakness confused by what we want and what we need..how can u be so sure of sumone and sumthing??.how will u know where willl u be in 10years and make a promise to forver be together....im nott scared of getting hurt but terrified of the unknown....i dun want him to stop loving mee..will he still lovee me if he knew...i dun wanna be a prisoner in my own mind..if u hold on to tight it mite slip but if hold on to loosely it mite do the samee... i wanaaa go back to where we were...holding ur hand and tellingg u forver will be me and u....without all the distractionss and interuptionss..before it got too complicatedd...all the simple thingss!!..please dun give up on mee...im stilllll a puzzle unsolveedd and broken be the one that remains patient and realise the countless flawss that makes up who i am....i loveee u darrenn!!

Labels: dun let go