disintegrate

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dedicated to a fren and brother.. CAlvin chee

i cant believe hes really gone and that i cant actually talk to him anymore..when i heard about it i couldn't fathom the situation and all i could do was cry and fall to the floor..in my head i kept thinking it wasnt true and all i wanted was to go back to brunei...ive nver lost such a close friend before and to think we knew each other since we were kids.. so from that moment on..the next few days my mind kept rewinding moments i had with cal..we actually all started playing tennis together when we were like 12 and then just grew up with each other...some memories il forver cherish and even forces me to laugh when i tnk about it...

cal has alwes been a great fren and for as long as i can remember he was just cool clavin nver lost his temper..the worse thing about it was that all he wanted was to ead a normal life..though he was sick..he never made it an excuuse to not live his life but instead did the complete opposite...in sportss he put just as much effort as any of the other guysss...evryone that had him in their livess is blessed....no matter if u knew him for a far or was as close as glue to him..it doesnt matter cus evryone feels that his presence is lost...but all we can do now i pray that hes in a better place..and thank GOD someone as special as cal came into this world...

tears will not stop flowing..
memories flood my thoughts..
i still cant belive ur gone..
im sad...
sad because i didnt tell u how special u were..
that i considered u a fren and a brother..
did u know how i felt?..
but now its too late..
so all im doing is lifting up prayerss for u..
hoping for ur soul to rest in peace..
and until we meet agen...
i hope my actions spoke louder than words..
il never forget the momentss we had..
the tears and laughter..
my heart is heavy stored up with cherished memories..
it realli isnt goodbye...
it cant be...